142 days of motivation!

Writing my goals down has been a deliberate action that I have taken the last eight years.  When I look at my spreadsheet from 2010, I laugh because I wasn’t very good at it.  My goals were small, they weren’t very specific, and there also wasn’t very many of them.

Fast forward to today, and I look at my goal sheet and it looks more like a ten-year strategic plan for a very successful and large organization.  And as good as I am in the area of strategic goal setting and accomplishing the goals I have set for myself, there is always room for improvement.

A couple of years ago my mentor challenged me to write down my goals every single day.  Yes.  Every day.  He writes them down in the morning and again at night.  I don’t do this, although maybe I should.

So around a year and a half ago or so, I started doing this.  I started writing down my top ten to fifteen goals I have in my life every single day. These goals could be one year, two-year, or even ten-year goals.

These goals are not the strategic document that I write down at the end of the year for the following year.  That document is much more comprehensive and very specific.  I do write down the ten to fifteen overarching bigger goals that I want to accomplish in my life though. The big things.

By doing this I have learned that I am much more motivated to stay motivated and accomplish the goals.  I am reminded every single morning that I must do this, or take this action or that action, because if I am going to accomplish the goal, that is what is required.

I have learned that although I had a very good goal setting and goal accomplishing process that I could be even better than I was.

One of the big goals that my wife and I had in 2018 was to buy her a new car with cash.  Not a brand new car, but something a few years old.  And since we both like really nice cars, I knew this would be an expensive endeavor.  When we sat down at the end of 2017 and the start of 2018, we wrote this goal down as something we were going to do in 2018.

We didn’t know when we would do it in 2018, there wasn’t an exact date.  It really came down to when we chose to do it, and when it made sense based off our income flow of the business.

Here is one thing though, I didn’t want to use our money to buy the car.  I wanted to use someone else’s money.  Which required me to get up every single day and make sales calls, follow-up with clients, and find new clients so we could get the money to buy the car.

From the time I first wrote down the goal on 12/7/2017 to 4/28/2018, it was exactly 142 days.   I wrote the goal down for 142 days just like this:

“We paid cash for a brand new car this year.”

If I am honest, I will tell you that I started off writing down the goal as:

“We paid cash for a brand new Lexus this year.”

But my wife decided that she did not want a Lexus.  Probably because I have one.  So the goal changed over the 142 days to just a car. Because we didn’t know exactly what she wanted until the day we bought it.  As you can see by the picture I didn’t get what I originally wrote down.

I tell you my story not to brag but to encourage you to set goals.  You must write down your goals for your life. This is required.  Whether or not you choose to write them down every day is up to you, even though I would highly suggest you do. Especially the bigger goals and even the more immediate goals you are going after.

As an executive coach and trainer I work with companies and individuals to help them accomplish their companies goals and their personal goals.  If you are interested in learning my system let’s have a conversation.  Hit me up at bwillett555@gmail.com

To your success and your future.

 

 

 

 

 

Can people really change?

This is a question that I have been asked many times by people.  You most likely have a strong opinion on this question as well.  Can people really change?  Especially if they are more experienced (older) and more stuck in their ways.

As a leader for well over twenty years now, a full-time corporate trainer and speaker the last five years. I have come across lots of people in a variety of different environments. I have also studied human behaviors for the last ten years or so.  When I say study, I mean not only through observation, I have been doing that for my entire life.  I mean studying the research that has been conducted and collected by some of the experts in the field of human behavior since the beginning of time.

One of the best books I have read on the study of human behavior, and specifically on the question of whether or not humans can Change, is a book titled Change or Die, The Three Keys to Change at work and in Life.  

In the book, the authors look at research conducted by doctors on people who were diagnosed with severe heart issues.  Some of the participants in the study even have had open heart surgery to other heart related surgeries.  The question was simple.  When faced with death, would the patients change their behaviors to prevent future heart related issues.

What do you think they found?  Did people change their behaviors?

The study concluded that after one year after the diagnosis, or the surgery, that well over 50% of the patients had stopped taking the medication they were supposed to be taking.  At after two years, well over 90% were back to the same behaviors and lifestyles they had before the surgery or diagnosis.

This example says a lot about change doesn’t it?  It says that even when faced with death, change is very hard. Luckily most of us are not in position at this moment that we have to make a life or death decision, and our willingness to change determines what the outcome will be.

However, many people are in situations where making some changes could greatly impact their career and success. The question is, are they willing to make the changes necessary. As the book would tell you, most people aren’t.  But the book, also shares many stories on where people did make changes and how they did it. And in my business, I see the same thing.

From my observations through meeting thousands of people in my training seminars and courses, I have watched people significantly change to get better outcomes in their life and their business.  But there are some conditions and questions that must be answered for those changes to occur in those people.

First, the person must have a need to make a change.  As my mentor said, we make changes for two reasons.  We are either inspired or desperate.  Obviously, both situations lead to change.  I just prefer to make the changes before I am desperate to have to make the change.

For example: Lets says I am an employee at a company.  I have been there for five years.  I know my business pretty well.  So well, that I don’t listen to feedback very well.  Matter of fact, I dismiss most suggestions people make.  In addition to being dismissive I am kind of known as a jerk that nobody likes to work around.

This person could become inspired to make changes, because they realize the impact they are having on the coworkers around them.  Or they could be sat down by their manager and told how they are perceived, and if they don’t change it they will no longer work there anymore.

In either case, a need has been identified, but the better path is to become aware of the change yourself and start to make shift.

My experience tells me that people who do make changes see the need.

The second piece to change is the want.  Do they want to make the change.  Again, it comes down to motivation.  How motivated are you to want to make the change.  If you are about to lose your job, you may be highly motivated, however, are you sold on the concept?   You could fake it for a while, but eventually it will come out on whether or not you really want to change.

In my observations, the people who really see the need and then really want to change are the ones who can make the changes.  And I know it isn’t that simple.  The environment has to be right, and then the right support has to be there as well, but when the need and the want are strong by the individual, change will occur.

The third piece to making a change is a question the person will ask themselves. Can I change?  The simple answer is, Yes, they can change.  But it is the follow-up question that is more important.  Will I change?  We can all change, it is just whether or not will we change.  These two questions, have to be asked and answered with a yes.

To answer the question I posed at the beginning.  Can people change?  Yes, I whole heartedly believe people can change.  They must answer the four questions above though.

Do they see a need to change, however the need is presented to them.  Either they see the need or someone shows the need to them.  Do they want to change?  And then lastly, do they think they can, and will they do whatever it takes to make the changes. When these four questions are answered, and how they are answered, you will know whether or not someone will make a change.

Once these four questions are answered, and answered correctly, the person is willing to do whatever it takes to make whatever the change is.  Then they must get in to the right system or program to make the changes.  This is where it can get complicated.  What is the best system.  I’ll keep it generic on my suggestions as far as what the right system is.  I will just tell you what I believe the system must include.

First the system, must have a singular focus.  It must be focused on whatever the change the person is trying to make is.

Secondly, it must have daily accountability of some kind, that requires the person who is making the change to have to be accountable to.

Thirdly, they must receive some kind of coaching along the way.

Lastly, it must be at least a year-long process with accountability and follow-up.  This is by far one of the most critical things.  The bottom line is change is hard, we know this.  People would rather die than change, as the book validates.  And this kind of change doesn’t happen over night, it takes at least a year to make sustainable changes to a behavior that we have had for a long time.

I have watched people in my training courses make significant changes in their behaviors over the years.  Whether it is a leader that changes the way they interact with their employees and peers.  Or the sales person that has to change their work behaviors to make more sales.

These people were able to make these changes, because they not only answered the four questions.  They had a need, they wanted to make the change, and the sad they Can and they said that they will.  But they also found the right system, with a singular focus, with daily accountability and coaching, and they were committed to at least a certain period of time to work in the system to make the changes.  They haven’t always been year-long processes, but they were lengthy periods of time.

Here is the question for you.  Can you change?  Are you willing to make a change?

I know the answer to the question.  People can change. Will you?

To your success and your future.

 

 

Spaghetti and Marshmallows and why kindergartners beat CEO’s in this task.

If you had to make a bet on which team could perform a certain task better between a group of kindergartners, or a group of business students amongst some of the top elite schools in the United States and abroad.  Who would you bet on?

Peter Skillman, an engineer, put together a competition to answer this question.  The task was simple.  He assembled groups of four people at several colleges and universities.  Their task was to see who which group could build the tallest possible structure using the following items:

  • twenty pieces of uncooked spaghetti
  • one yard of transparent tape
  • on yard of string
  • one standard size marshmallow

The contest had one rule.  The marshmallow had to be the final thing on top of the tower.

Who did you bet on?

The students took the approach of first tossing ideas back and forth.  They asked questions to each other.  They looked at several different options.  It was very strategic and professional.  They then decided on an approach.  Divided up the tasks and started building.

The kindergartners did something different.  They didnt strategize. They did not analyze anything or generate any ideas, or banter back and forth. Nope they stood amongst each other.  Grabbed the materials and started building.  No plan.  No strategy.  They started putting things together, and as they got in to it.  They would say to each other.  “Lets try this”.  “No, here”.  “Lets put that here.”

So who did you bet that would build the taller structure?

If you bet on the business school students, you are wrong. In dozens of trials, kindergartners built structures that average twenty-six inches tall, while the students from these universities average structure was about ten inches tall.

Teams of kindergartners not only consistently outperformed business school students, but they also conducted these same trials with lawyers and CEO’s.  The lawyers averaged fifteen inch structures and the CEO’s averaged twenty-two inches structures.

So how is it? and Why is it?  That kindergartners could outperform all of these highly educated and skilled groups of people?

The simple answer is that kindergartners:

  • Don’t have any egos.
  • They are not trying to prove their intelligence
  • They are not trying to be in charge.
  • They aren’t scared to speak up because they may be wrong.
  • They are not afraid to say no to each other.
  • They are not trying to adapt to any social norms.

Nope.  The kindergarteners are just looking at a task that they have been asked to do and just doing it.  Although the research doesn’t mention this, but maybe the kindgartners also have a better imagination.  They are not trying to put limits on themselves and say what can’t be done. Instead, they just try to do things.  This by itself leads to better outcomes, because if you aren’t willing to fail, which it doesn’t even cross the minds of these kindergartners, than you will never know what truly could be done.

In today’s world, probably as you are reading this.  You are on your way to work where either you, or someone you will work with today, will be trying to solve a problem.  Instead of trying to decide who is boss.  Or who should be doing this or that.  I would encourage you to instead take the same approach as the kindergartners did in this research and determine what is the best way to do this and forget everything else.

I know this is a hard ask.  But if we would all approach issues at work, or in our own personal lives this way, we would accomplish a lot more.  There would be less tension and conflict amongst our peers and in our own personal relationships.  And we would just be happier altogether.

See if you can approach life-like a kindergartner today and see how it works out for you.

To your success and your future.

You can watch the TED talk on this research here as well.

My top 10 books out of the last 100 I’ve read!

I recently hit another milestone in my learning journey.  I just finished book number four hundred in seven years.  For some of you, that may seem like a small number.  But to me, from where I started, to where I am today, this is a an amazing accomplishment for me.

I have written countless times about the power, the confidence, and the joy that I get from reading.  But if you have not read any of that up until now.  I will say it again.  There is not one other thing that I have decided to do in my life and in my career, that has been more beneficial to my success financially, mentally, and relational, than making the decision to become an avid reader of books.  This one discipline has provided me with so much more in my life.

Become a reader and your life will change.  You can start with the list I have for you here.

Its funny, as I look back over books 300 to 400.  It was really easy to compile this list. Well, the fact that I have a grading and scoring system that I manage and track for all of the books I read makes it pretty easy.  But that alone, isn’t the only reason.

This list came together so easily, because the books on this list were by far and away, just really that good.  I am not sure how many of them were actually best sellers, but all of them had a profound impact on me which is why they made the list.

These books, aren’t necessarily the best written, most sold, most known (which I guess would also mean most sold), the longest, etc. No.  These books, had a profound impact on the way I thought, or provided me some new insight that I could apply that could make me more successful.  That is how they make the list.  They had an impact on me.

Maybe they will have an impact on you. Remember, click the title of the book and the link will take you right to Amazon so you can purchase the audio version or the hardcopy of the book. These books are in no particular order.

  1.  9 Things You simply Must do to Succeed in Love and Life; author Dr. Henry Cloud.
    Dr. Cloud is a phenomenal writer and speaker.  He has several best-selling books.  This book I picked up at a discount rack somewhere.  The reason I put it on the list is because he has two chapters in the book that really were amazing.  One chapter on playing fair and the other chapter on hate.In the hate chapter he discusses the practice of hating in a way that solves problems instead of creating them. Cloud suggests that hating well preserves life and hating poorly destroys life. An integral component of hating well is objectivity, which hates the issue without hating the person.

    In the chapter on Don’t Play Fair he discusses the practice of loving unconditionally. Loving without conditions is unfair and incredibly powerful. Further, the author suggests that loving without conditions is possible only when healthy detachment exists. In summary, undeserved love transforms lives.

  2. The Business of the 21st Century; author Robert Kiyosaki
    If you have lived under a rock the last twenty years or so, you may not be familiar with Robert Kiyosaki.  He is the author of Rich Dad Poor Dad, and created a massive training company around that title as well.  I received this book from someone who was trying to sell me on joining their MLM (Multi Level Marketing) company.  If you don’t know what MLM is, I again, want to tell you to get out from under the rock.Some people call it Direct Marketing.  But it is selling products through a specific brand like a Herbalife, Amway, Beachbody, etc. to name a few of the bigger ones.  The process for MLM is where a person sells the products to people they know in their circles, and then from there they build a team of people doing it.  As you build a team within their organization you earn money from all of the sales the people on your team make, in addition to your own. I digress.

    This book is somewhat of a promotion of this type of business. A business that I personally have no desire to be in.  I don’t have a problem with the business model, I just don’t want to be in it. However, I am thankful for the book.Robert Kiyosaki is really successful and in the book he is promoting the MLM business, but this book has a whole lot of practical advice on why it is important for everybody to start some kind of business.  Whether it is real estate, selling products, or something else. Everyone should be involved in their full time job and a part-time job doing something that could eventually grow into something bigger.

  3. Be Obsessed or Be Average; author Grant Cardone
    Grant Cardone is a best-selling author and one of the top influencers on all social media platforms.  He is everywhere.  He has two primary goals.  First he is a sales trainer and his company sells sales training.  Secondly, he has built a huge company where he owns over 5,000 apartments around the country. The reason this book was so impactful is Grant is probably the best motivator I have ever listened to or read.  He will make you think bigger and differently than you have ever thought before.This book, is somewhat of  continuation of his 10X book. However, you don’t need to have read the 10X book before you read this one. Although I read the hard copy version, I would encourage you to buy the audible or audio version of this book.  Grant has a way of reading his books like no other person can.  He will get you motivated.
  4. Rejection Proof: How to Beat Fear and Become Invincible, author: Jia Jiang
    After I read this book, I immediately was more motivated to go out and do some of the things I was most fearful of.  I picked up the phone and called a CEO that had been putting me off.  I wasn’t scared of the CEO, or at least, I would have told you I wasn’t.  However, what is the worst that can happen.  There is no growth without a little fear, hesitation, and some discomfort, but that is also where the growth and success exists as well.  Read this book and you will learn how to overcome your fear.  This was one of the best books I have read in a long time about sales and it isn’t even a sales book, but it is.
  5. Win Bigly: Persuasion in a World Where Facts Don’t Matter, author: Scott Adams (Dilbert creator).  Scott Adams is the creator of the world-famous comic strip Dilbert. But Adams is not only a cartoonist, but he is a great writer.  Most of his books are around this topic of persuasion and how we can have more influence.  In this book, he talks about why he was one of the first to predict that Donald Trump would win the Presidential election in 2016.  He made this prediction because of Donald Trump’s ability to persuade and convince people.  This book is well written and is truly a lesson on how you can be more persuasive and convincing and grab attention in todays complex and noisy world.
  6. Nudge: Improving Decision about Health, Wealth, and Happiness; Author: Richard Thaler.  This book is about how every day we make choices—about what to buy or eat, about financial investments or our children’s health and education, even about the causes we champion or the planet itself. Unfortunately, we often choose poorly. Nudge is about how we make these choices and how we can make better ones. The authors show that no choice is ever presented to us in a neutral way, and that we are all susceptible to biases that can lead us to make bad decisions. The author’s research show us that when things are presented in a certain way, we can change the buying patterns for people.  These little nuances can help everyone become healthier and even wealthier.  Richard Thaler also won the Nobel Prize in Economics in 2017 for his work around behavioral economics.
  7. Anti Cancer; A new Way of Life; author: David Servan-Schreiber, M.D., Ph. This book chronicles the story about how the author was diagnosed with brain cancer and the steps he took to fight and ultimately beat cancer.  He tells us his story, but also provides the readers his playbook, based on his success and his research, on what we can all do to not only fight cancer, but prevent it.  The biggest thing I learned was that a few changes in my diet could prevent me from ever having to deal with this.
  8. Made to Stick; Why Some Ideas Survive and others Die; authors: Chip and Dan Heath. In typical Heath brothers fashion, this book is peppered with lots of great research and support to back up their claims and the processes they suggest.  Through this process they outline several steps we can all take to come up with and deliver messages that stick with our audience. Whether you are a parent trying to get a message to stick with your child, to a manager trying to get adoption of a new process. This book tells you how to communicate in a way that gets things to stick.
  9. The Thomas Sowell Reader; Author Thomas Sowell.  Sowell is an American economist, turned social theorist, political philosopher, and author. He is currently Senior Fellow at the Hoover Institution, Stanford University. This book is a collection of the authors columns that have been syndicated in Newspapers for the last forty years, and our still being distributed.  Sowell’s opinions on everything from race, religion, politics, to every other hot button topic you hear about everyday is refreshing.  The way he breaks down and communicates in his writings his arguments on all of these topics will challenge you to think about the topic differently, regardless of what side of the argument you are on.  He believes in personal responsibility and that government should not be in our lives as much as they are.  Yes, he would be labeled as a conservative on many of his views.  However, I consider most of his arguments to be just very practical and straightforward.
  10. Steal Like an Artist; 10 Things Nobody Told you about Being Creative; author: Austin Kleon.  This book is the shortest read on the list.  The book is actually really tiny, but that doesn’t mean that it isn’t impactful.  The information in the book, the quotes, the ideas the author throws out will really get you thinking about how you can get your creative juices flowing.  In addition, the author reminds you that everything we create is some form of a copy of something else.  Nothing is original.  We all have to start from something.  And he makes you feel good about how you go about creating and developing your material in whatever it is that you do.  This book isn’t only for people who currently do work that must be created, this is for someone who would like to be more creative.  This book will show you how to do it.

I hope you pick up a few of the books that I have recommended here.  When it comes to reading, I have learned that I must seek out other people’s opinions on books and get recommendations.  Most people won’t recommend a bad book.  I won’t, unless I think it will help someone based on whatever it is they are dealing with and working through.

But that is the point, many of the books I recommend and say are my best.  May only have been the best, because of what I was doing at the time I read them.  Of the four hundred books I have read, some of them, if I read them again today, I might be looking at them through a whole different set of eyes based on my perspective now.  And this list could be a totally different list.

My only advice to you is this. Become a reader.  Start finding books or even listening to books.  It will change your life. It has mine.

To your success and your future.

 

Bring the pain and the results will follow.

At the first signs of pain, most people usually quit.  It could be the pain associated with exercising.  The pain of having to cook dinner instead of going out to eat to save money. Or, it could be the pain of finally tackling that project that you have been putting off.

Our ability to endure pain, physical or mental, could be the secret that leads to success or failure in accomplishing our goals.

Karel Gijsbers, a psychologist at the University of Stirling, in Scotland, published an influential paper in the British Journal of Medicine in 1981. Gijsbers along side one of his graduate students, put 30 elite swimmers from the Scotland National team through a series of pain tests and then compared those results to 30 Club Level swimmers and 26 non-athletes.

The protocol for this study involved cutting off the circulation to the subjects arms with a blood-pressure cuff, and then having them clench and unclench their fist once per second. The “Pain Threshold” was defined as the number of contractions needed to produce a sensation that registered as pain rather than merely discomfort. “Pain Tolerance” was quantified as the total number of contractions before the subject gave up.

The first finding was that the pain threshold was essentially the same in all three groups, starting around 50 contractions.  The second time the test was conducted the results were different. The pain tolerance of the National Team swimmers endured an average of 132 contractions before calling it quits.  Compared to the 89 in the club swimmers and 70 in the non-athletes.

Gijsbers remarked that because of the more systematic approach in which the National Team Swimmers exposed themselves to pain during training, that they had created or harnessed brain chemicals like endorphins, or perhaps simply thanks to psychological coping that allowed them to endure more pain.   He also said that “pain” can be strangely motivating or even required to the highly motivated athlete.

Gijsbers conducted these studies three more times throughout the year and found that the National Team Swimmers scored highest in June, which is their peak racing season; lowest in October, which is their off-season, and somewhere in the middle during their regular training period in March.

These seasonal fluctuations suggest that pain tolerance is linked to the type of training that the swimmers were doing during each of these testing periods. During the season, they were pushing their limits every single day, which provided them more tolerance based on their daily training schedules.

Similar studies have been done since Gijsbers studies in 1981, and they have all concluded with similar results.

So if pain is required to have more success, how do I train myself to be able to endure more pain?

For the purposes of this writing, I will stick to the topic of just exposing yourself to more pain.  To be able to endure more pain, you have to set a goal a reason for that goal.  I have covered those topics extensively in other writings.  Email me if you are interested in reading those bwillett555@gmail.com

In a recent book I read, it discussed the fact that when it comes to exercise that most of us will quit long before we ever run into any possibility of really hurting ourselves.  Our body is hardwired to shut down well before we could possibly ever get in to serious trouble of actually dying.  But if you have ever worked out before, really really hard, you may feel like you are about to die while you are in the moment.

At this peak of exhaustion and mental anguish is when most people quit. They don’t push themselves through the pain, because most of us are don’t want to feel this kind of pain.  However, when you are feeling this pain it is when you are actually burning the most calories and optimizing the benefits from the actual exercise you are doing.

I’m not suggesting you go forever, I’m just suggesting you may want to push yourself during this pain for a certain amount of time, and then each workout after you continue to push yourself to stay in that zone longer and longer.  This is where you will start to see more results and growth.

What about the pain associated with eating dinner at home versus going out to eat.  I have been there before, I was in debt and spending close to thirty to thirty-five percent of my monthly income on going out to eat.  If you are spending that much money on eating out and you add-on top of that twenty-five percent in housing costs, and then all of your other expenses, including the debts.  You can see real quickly that you won’t make much progress on eliminating your debts.

My suggestion is to first figure out how much you are spending and on which days do you typically do this.  I am sure you will see a pattern.  Then decide which days or day you will pick to stop doing this. It could be on Mondays or Saturdays.  It depends on your pattern. It could be on the days you attend class or your kid plays sports.

Now that you have the day picked out, decide what you will do instead. Will it be cooking at home that day.  Or should you pick another day to make additional food, so you can eat leftovers on the day you pick?   Seems like a lot of work doesn’t it?  It is so much easier to just eat out instead.

Yes it sure does. But this isn’t getting you any closer to your goals of paying off debt.  Your ability to endure the pain is what will either help or hurt you in achieving this goal.

I am quite sure that if you are reading this your goal is not to be an Olympic Swimmer.  However, I do think you are like most people and want to find a way to get ahead and move you and your family closer to your ideal situation financially as well as lifestyle wise.

To do this, it is going to require you to do things that you haven’t been able to do before successfully.  As my mentor told me, “To get what you have never had, you have to do something that you have never done.”  Maybe this is you as well.

Enduring pain and making sacrifices is not a forever thing.  It is only for a season, a period of time, it isn’t going to last forever.  If you endure some pain during a workout for three months or so, each day enduring more and more.  Eventually you will hit your goal.  If you don’t eat out for a period of time, you will eventually get to a better financial position than you are currently. Believe me, I have lived this personally.

So the question is are you willing to endure some pain to accomplish your goals?

To your success and your future.

If you need some help with this contact me at bwillett555@gmail.com I am currently meeting with clients to help them achieve the things they want in their life and in their career.

Excerpts for this blog taken from the book Endure; Mind, Body, and the Curiously Elastic Limits of Human Performance written by Alex Hutchinson. 

 

 

 

 

Unrealized Potential, do you have some?

I recently read a quote or statement that said that the graveyard is full of unrealized goals, un-lived dreams and untapped-into potential.

I am not sure if it is just me, but this statement just resonates with me.  It does sound a little morbid, but it paints such a clear picture of what I don’ want.  Who wants to wake up one day and say to themselves:

  • “I wish I would have done more”.
  • “I wish I could have done that.”
  • “I wish I would have pursued that”
  • ” I wish I didn’t spend so much time on that”

All of these statements are things that I can change now.  I have control over all of these things.

My mentor said it this way.

He said that the pain of regret weighs tons, and the pain of discipline weighs ounces.

If it is not obvious to you. This statement means that it is much easier to do the things today and everyday, that is necessary for you to realize your potential and live your life to the fullest, by just implementing the right daily disciplines in your life.  The work is hard, but when you are consistent it gets easier.

But if you don’t do the things you are supposed to do.  And you allow neglect in certain areas of your life to creep in.  Whether it is your health, your wealth, or your education and knowledge, then one day you will wake up and have regret.  Because when you don’t focus on these important things in your life, and you neglect them consistently for a long period of time.  You will eventually wake up one day, and because of it, you will have regrets.

You will wake up one day at age 50 and know that you don’t have enough, or any money, saved for retirement.  You will go into work one day at 52 and learn that your company is not doing so well, and so they will be letting you go.  And because all you have every done at the company was one thing for many years, your skill set isn’t transferable to another job very easily.

And as I have learned from first hand experience in my personal life.  If you neglect your health for years and years it will eventually catch up to you.  As I am typing this, I can still see my fathers face as he was sitting in the emergency room that day.  I didn’t know and he didn’t know what was going on, but I know that it was the last time I saw him alive.

My dad was the best dad anybody could have.  I loved my dad.  He would do anything for anybody.  I had a great child hood.  But when it came to health and wellness, my dad was just not that interested in it.  I hate to say that he didn’t think about it, but he was old school. If he wasn’t bleeding or hurting, than nothing was wrong.

He would occasionally go on diets to lose a few pounds.  Or cut out certain foods here and there.  But it just wasn’t his top priority.  He was too busy doing work and life.

I am not sure about you, but I know for me that I never want to wake up one day and say any of the above statements.  I want to reach my potential in every aspect of my life.  I want to be the best husband that I can be.  I want to be the best I can be in my community and church.  I want to make the most money that I can make.  I want to be in the best shape and health I can be in.  I want to buy and own as many rental properties that I can buy.

You name it, and I want to achieve it.  But it isn’t going to happen unless: I choose to realize and fulfill my full potential.  My potential isn’t going to be realized doing things I shouldn’t be doing.  It isn’t going to be realized and fulfilled by spending hours and hours doing things that should only take one hour.  It isn’t going to realized and fulfilled by listening to people who don’t even know or care about what I am trying to accomplish.

Nope none of this will happen unless I decide and go all in.

I have to make the decision today and everyday, that I will do nothing and I will do everything that it takes to realize and fulfill my full potential.

Are you with me?

I didn’t hear you!

Are you with me?

If you are with me.  Drop me note in the comments section wherever you read this and let’s make it happen.

To your success and your future.

 

Why Power only exists in Truth

I am sure you have talked to someone before about a job, a relationship, or some other situation, where that person was receiving less than they deserve.  And what that usually means is that you, as their friend, colleague, or family member, believe that they are doing more and giving more to that relationship, job, etc., than the other party is giving.

But what if that wasn’t true.  What if there was more that the person could give.  What if this person was you and not someone else that was feeling this way. And you kept telling yourself that you are giving everything and not getting anything in return.  You are not getting what you deserve.

Everyday I work and see people that feel this way.  They believe that they are owed more. They believe that they deserve more.  They believe that they have done everything that they could do to improve their situation, but none of it has worked.  The relationship is still bad.  The pay on the job still sucks.  They didn’t receive the promotion.  They didn’t get the next assignment.

If you feel this way, or no someone who does.  I want to share this with you, because someone shared it with me, and it changed my life.  First of all, the market pays for the value that you or someone else brings to it.

My mentor told me this story once about how he went to his mentor and told him that the job wasn’t paying enough.  His mentor asked him this “Are there other people at your place of employment who make more money than you do?”  The answer was yes from my mentor.  Than his mentor shared these very remarkable words with him.

He said “Than it isn’t the company, it is the value you are bringing to the company. If you want to change your pay, you have to increase your value.”

The only way any of us can get paid more on the job, is to increase the value we bring to the job.  If you are a manager and you can manage a group of six or seven people to perform a job.  The company will pay you more.  If you can learn how to manage six or seven managers, which is a different skillset, than they will pay you even more money.

If you are a customer service representative and you are really good at taking calls on problems and solving those problems. The company will pay you a certain dollar amount for that.  But if you can not only take those calls, but you can train other people on how to do it as well, they will pay you more money.

Most companies have more money that they can pay you.  However, you just have to figure out a way to show them that you are worth more than what they are paying you.  Most people spend their time complaining about what they deserve instead of showing how they are worth more.  Stop talking and start showing.

One of the things most of us are in dire need of in our lives, is someone who can speak truth in to us.  Tell us something that we don’t really want to hear.  You may have heard the old saying that there is “Power in Truth”.  Why do you think that saying exists?

Because, until you hear the truth, you don’t have the power to change anything.  If you want to change your situation, you have to first understand your reality and the truth of where you really are.  Finding someone to give you this truth is very hard.  It usually requires someone who isn’t associated with you in any way to come in to your life and  help you assess where you are and then provide you the truth.

If you want to get to a different place, you have to understand where you are.  Not just your belief on where you are, but the actual truth on where you are.  Most of us don’t have the people in our lives that can or will provide us this truth.

If you are a person who wants truth and wants more than you currently have, than I would encourage you to reach out to me, and if it isn’t me, than someone else that can provide you the truth you need to hear.

email me at bwillett555@gmail.com for more insight and possibly partnering together.

To your success and your future.

 

 

 

Implementing this one activity every other day has been a game changer for my life.

There are certain things in life that all of us must do every single day.  Things like brush our teeth, eat, drink water, and… If you have children you have to make sure they do these same things everyday as well.

Now you could say that you have to go to work every single day, but that isn’t true.  Most of us have weekends off.  And if you don’t, you probably have vacation time. So what are the things we have to do every single day?  There probably aren’t very many things we must do every single day unless we choose to do it.

About a year and a half ago, I learned from one of my mentors to do this one thing every single day.  And it has been a game changer for me. My mentor said that I should write down my 10-15 biggest goals every single day.  Yes.  He said I should do this every single day.  He said he does it as soon as he wakes up and he does it again before he goes to bed.

Maybe he does or maybe he doesn’t.  He is wildly successful, so I am not going to question him. I like to try to do what really successful people do, so I gave it a shot.

First of all, for me, I have found that I don’t do it every day.  Hence why the title of the blog isn’t, “Implementing this one activity everyday has been a game changer for my life.”

There is really no reason why I can’t, but looking in my journal over the last year, I just didn’t.  I just looked at my journal and I counted 298 days that I wrote down my goals.  Not bad, but I could do better. Again, doing anything for 365 days a year is hard.  I can do better though.

I have been a very aggressive goal setter for the last ten or so years of my life.  I have accomplished so many things that I would have never dreamed of accomplishing, just because I wrote it down and made a plan to accomplish it.  I consider myself to be in the top one percent of goal setters and goal accomplishers.  This consideration is purely from my observations of hundreds, if not thousands of people, that I interact with in my business who don’t set goals. It is not a common thing.

All of this to say, that I know a lot about goal setting and I have helped a lot of people accomplish more in their life by becoming better goal setters.

So when my mentor told me to write down my goals every single day, I thought that this was a silly idea.  I said how will this help me.  I am already doing a really good job at setting and accomplishing goals.  I have a document that I write down all of my current year goals on, and included on that document is some long-range goals as well.  They all kind of go together.

But because of his challenge to me, I decided to take on this challenge of writing them down every day.  And in my case, I did it the last 298 days of my life. I didn’t write down every single goal.  I just wrote down the 10 to 15 bigger goals that I have in my life.

For example:  I turn forty next year.  I am not worried about the forty number, but one of my goals is to be in the best shape of my life, backed up with test results, when I turn forty next year. That is one of the goals I have written down the last 298 days of my life.

Another one is “I own 100 paid for rental properties”.  Yes a big goal.  I currently have five.

What I have learned from writing these goals down for the last 298 days, is that they are always in my head, they never leave.  I am reminding myself about them every day. This has helped me put in place certain habits and other things that are helping me work toward these goals.  Id dint have this before.  This has been really beneficial for me to doing what I need to do, every day to get closer to accomplishing the goals.

Most people never accomplish much because they never commit to accomplishing anything. That is why writing down your goals is co critical. But I have learned that writing them down every single day reminds me to do the things that I need to do so I can accomplish the goals.

This is not a to do list.  This is a reminder of the bigger things you want in your life. These are the big goals.  These bigger goals is where you get your motivation.

I can’t get too excited about running six miles a day, but I can get excited and motivated about being in the best shape of my life at the age of forty.

It is hard to get excited about making another sales call, or taking on a client that I know will be a pain in the ass.  But I know that I have to do it, to generate the money so I can get to my 100 rental properties.

These 10 or 15 goals set your task list for the day automatically.  The only difference is, the task list isn’t that exciting, but the goals list is.

As you can tell, I have some room for improvement in this area as well, but I want to challenge you to try this.  I consider myself to be a pretty self motivated person, but after doing this the last 298 days, I am even more motivated and committed to my goals and to my success and this has pushed me to do even more every day to get closer to accomplishing them.

If you want more information about my process, email me at bwillett555@gmail.com

To your success and your future.

Check out this blog for more information about the value of writing down your goals.

A new season

Over 100 million people watched the Super Bowl this past Sunday.  The New England Patriots were the heavy favorite and rightfully so going into the game.  But, unless you have been hiding the last seventy-two hours you know that they didn’t win. They were beaten by the underdog, the Philadelphia Eagles.

Now, I am not a NFL Football expert. However, the New England Patriots are considered to be one of the best teams ever, because of their long time coach Bill Belichick and their quarterback Tom Brady.  There has been a lot of speculation on whether they both will return next year to play and coach another year.  Or will they retire.  I believe all of the experts agree that Tom Brady will most likely be back in uniform next year, but most of them are unsure about whether or not Bill Belichick will be back as the head coach.

Regardless if they retire or not, they both have now moved on from the last season.  Last season ended on Sunday night after losing the Super Bowl.  For the last nineteen years,  with their eight Super Bowl appearances, five Super Bowl wins, and the countless other victories and accomplishments.  They both know that for them to have that sustained success, that they can’t dwell in the past too long, and they must move on to the next season and start preparing for the next season.

The sad part about a season ending is the fact that all of the hard work, sacrifice, and wins don’t carry any weight into the new season.  Well, at least not the victories.  For them to have success in the next season, they have to do it all over again.  They have to prepare, they have to be disciplined, and they have to sacrifice all over again.  And they have to start all over at Zero Wins and Zero Losses.

Even though starting fresh and new can be challenging and daunting, when you think about it.  It can also be exciting and exhilarating.  The fact that you get to start all over, in many cases with new team mates and new opponents.  They both will be another year wiser and more experienced.

In the NFL they have no choice.  A season only lasts so long.  I know the regular season is seventeen weeks, and when you include the playoffs, I believe the entire season, including the weeks leading up to the Super Bowl, it is like twenty-three weeks.  The season has an end date.  Once it is over, it’s over.

Life for the rest of us is different.  It doesn’t necessarily have end dates for our seasons.  It isn’t that definitive.   Now, there may be a season where you work someone where for a period of time and then decide to move on to another employer.  Or there may be a season where you are living your life a certain way, like maybe when you were single or in your twenties.  Or you may be in a relationship with a person for a period of time, and then that relationship ends.  All of these situations could have been a season for you.

But in most cases, our lives are not that seasonal and defined with a begin date and end date.  When we need to be our best and when we can slack off some.  Nope instead we are left to ourselves to determine when a season begins and when a season should end. And from my experience there have been many times where I may have stayed within a season too long.

Here is my challenge for you.  Do you know what season you are in?  Have you been in your current season too long?  Maybe you have been complaining about this job for the last several years, but you haven’t taken the next steps to move on.

Maybe you have been in that relationship that isn’t going anywhere too long.  You just keep breaking up and getting back together.  Or maybe you have been together, but the relationship is not growing.  Maybe you have been thinking about going back to school, but you just haven’t pulled the trigger.

Regardless of where you are in life right now, it isn’t always going to be that way.  But you have the ability and the right to make it whatever you want.  You just have to decide to make a change and start a new season for your life.

Tom Brady , Bill Belichick, and the New England Patriots season ended on Sunday.  But they know the next one starts soon and they are already preparing for it.  In your case, you have to decide when your next season will start?  Are you ready for it?  Or are you going to ride this season out to the end?

To your success and your future.

 

New Year. New You. Or have you already quit?

New Year. New You.  Does this sound like you?  Hey, I hope so.  I think the beginning of the year is as good as any to start a new thing.  Whether it is your health, your money, a bad habit you want to quit, or anything else.

But do you want to know what is even better than a new start or a fresh start?  To never quit in the first place.

I have been looking at my Facebook feed since the beginning of 2018.  Which is exactly 31 days ago from the time I am writing this blog.  Today is February 1, 2018.  I see a lot of people on there pursuing these new things, and many of them said the same thing last year.  And most of them quit by this time last year, and many quit before the end of the year on whatever it was they were doing. They are now attempting it again.  I am proud of you.  Stay with it this time.

Hey, I have been there before.  I am no different from anyone else.  Working out is a discipline that I just do.  I don’t have to think about it. I just do it.  I have been doing it for so long that it is just past of who am I.

However, where my opportunity for a fresh start exists. Is eating better. Just like many of the people in my Facebook feed, I have made some changes to my diet this year.  When I was younger, I always thought I could just exercise my way through a bad diet.  And what I have found the older I have gotten, that this has become increasingly more difficult.  So I had to make a fresh start as well.

In this blog I want to suggest a few ideas that can keep you consistent versus always having to start over.

A new year is a great place to start a new thing.  However, it doesn’t only have to be at the beginning of a New Year though.  In Daniel Pinks new book “When: The Scientific Secrets to Perfect Timing” He actually provides a list of 86 different days, dates, events, etc. that could be a great time for you to make a fresh start.  The first year being one of them and here are just a few more from his book:

  • First day of the month
  • Mondays (52)
  • Seasons (4)
  • Your birthday
  • Your anniversary of whatever
  • First day back from vacation
  • A Holiday

His goal was to get us thinking about the different days that we could use other than the first of the year to provide us a fresh start.

If you made a commitment on January 1, 2018, and have already quit, today would be a great day to start over again. You don’t have to wait until next year.  The first of the month is as good or better day to start than others.

Here is the good news.  If you are someone who quits and has had to start again.  Don’t wait until another year goes by before you start again.  Use another date and start your commitment from that date.   Today would be a good day to do that.

How else can you keep going?  As a runner, I have had a few injuries along the way. And I am the opposite of my most people.  If I don’t workout or exercise, I get very irritable, because it is breaking my routine. And I hate to break my routine. Over the years, as I have had these injuries, I would just have to modify my workouts. If my leg or calf is bothering me, then I would just do an upper body workout.  If my upper body is sore, maybe I just do a leg workout or run.

The key is to not stop.  But you may have to make adjustments and modify. What is it that you are trying to accomplish?  If you have already quit.  Why did you quit?  Were you trying to go all-in too fast?  If that is the case, don’t quit, make adjustments.

I had someone tell me one time, that you only have to get in shape once.  And that is the hard part. Once you do, then you just have to maintain it. Since then, I have never quit. Are there times where I more focused and disciplined than others?  Absolutely, but I never quit and that is the key to success when it comes to health and fitness and most anything else in life.

Another way to keep your commitment and not quit.  Is to remember why you wanted this in the first place.  And when I say remember it, I highly demand that you write it down.  By writing it down you put it to memory.

If you want to become healthier?  Why?  Is it because you want to look good in a bikini or without a shirt on if you are a guy.  If it is to quit spending so much.  Why is this so important to you?  Is it because you want to have a more secure future?  Is your job situation uncertain?  Or is it because you hate your job and you need to be prepared for an exit?

I have written about goals a lot here.  And if you are interested in taking your goal setting and goal accomplishing to the next level, then I would encourage you to reach out to me.  I have some resources that could be beneficial to you.

But I want you to do this one thing to increase the likelihood that you don’t have to start all over again.  And that is write down your goal, why that goal is important to you, and when you will accomplish it by.  Once you do this, you will be well on your way to accomplishing the things you want to accomplish.

To your success and your future.