Quit lying to yourself and do this instead

This year will be different… I am going to do this… And I will quit this… I will commit to making sure this happens… And I will finally finish this…

Question:  How are you doing on these things?

Answer: Well this year has been different, because…. I was going to do that, but… And I quit doing that for a few… And I still have time to finish that…

Does this sound like you? Or someone you know?  If it does, I am sorry.  Because lets just be frank about it.  If this sounds like your or someone you know the chances anything will change is really slim to none.

So why won’t things change?  Well, unfortunately, your track record tells us everything we need to know.  Your decisions up until this point tell me that you aren’t willing or aren’t capable of doing whatever it is you said you were going to do.  To actually commit and accomplish, yes the most important word here is accomplish.  Anything you set your mind to, is first you must commit to it.  And when I say commit to it, I mean write it down and say I will complete this or accomplish this and I will not stop until….I do it.

If you aren’t willing to take the time to make a commitment on paper or on your computer of your goals, then the chances are very high you won’t be willing to commit to what it will take to accomplish the goal either. We both know the writing of the goal is the easier part here, however, it is one that most people fail to do the most.

I have talked about the magic of writing very specific goals before.  Something truly magical happens when you write a goal down.  By doing this you are subconsciously telling yourself that this is something that is important to you and that you want to achieve it.  The brain is a very powerful thing.

Your subconscious kicks in and you don’t won’t to disappoint yourself.  Nobody does.  We all hate disappointment, Don’t we?  The worst kind of disappointment is the kind of disappointment that we know we have control over the outcome. So when we write the goal down we will do whatever it takes to not disappoint ourselves.

So here is your challenge, I have a goal setting plan for you.  It is pretty simple. But it requires a lot of work on your end.  We can start small and build from there.  If you are interested in learning more about the goal setting plan reach out to me by email or respond to this post.

To your success and your future.

 

 

How to leave a voicemail that prospects will bend over backwards to return

Humans are really easy to understand if you think about what makes us tick, gets us excited, scared, angry, etc.  Yes we are emotional beings.  And we only care about ourselves.  I know, someone out there is saying to themselves right now.  I don’t only care about myself.  I put others before myself. Blah, Blah, Blah.  Maybe you do.  But what if I told you your were fired.  You wouldn’t be thinking about the money you spend each month on your charity of choice.  Nope. The first thing you would think about is how you are going to pay your mortgage, car, or put food on the table.

This week, I was reminded again, how selfish most humans really are.

As a sales manager, I not only sell but I also manage a sales team.  In my business, some sales reps stay for a while and there are some that stay for a season and move on.  Thats okay.  It happens, what we do is hard.

I get the resignation letter and we have a conversation. The employee tells me they are willing to work out the two weeks.  I really needed that person to do that so we could get things in place to make a smooth transition.  They weren’t going to a competitor, so I was good with it. We get three days into the two weeks they are to work, and the person goes awol.  They don’t return my phone calls. They are not sending emails or returning my texts.

Look I am a pragmatist.  I have been in business long enough that I understand that when people have made a decision to leave their position, in their minds they have already left the position. Most likely, they left the position weeks or months ago. But now it is just final, because they finally let their manager know.  So the fact they weren’t returning my calls. I understand.  No hard feelings.  We will both move on.  However, don’t expect to get a two-week paid vacation; in between jobs at my expense.

After the third day of no return calls, texts, or emails. I left a message for the sales rep.  It sounded something like this.

“I was just calling to let you know that this will be your last day on the payroll.  I appreciate your willingness to work out the two weeks, but it is evident that you have already moved on.  And that is okay.  But we will be ending your employment as of today.”

Again, I am not upset at this point. We both are moving on. That is life.

So after leaving voice mails for three days and not getting any response. I leave the above voicemail. And wouldn’t you know, I get a call back within one hour of leaving the message.

So we talk about what needs to happen and everything is ok. They were a good colleague and in the future we will most likely do business together.

But as I was talking with a colleague of mine about this situation, they reminded me of what a great illustration of how to leave a voicemail that the person receiving the message will actually care enough to return.

As my story illustrates very vividly.  When we leave a voicemail with someone we must communicate what we offer and how it could directly impact their bottom line, as it did in this case, it creates the urgency for them to take action.  I have no idea why they didn’t return my calls the three days prior, and it doesn’t matter.  However, when you do finally strike a nerve that impacts them directly, emotionally, and in this case financially, it will cause action to occur and they will return your phone call.

So today as I making phone calls to prospects I will be reminding myself constantly about this interaction. If I want to get my phone call returned, I must leave a message that states how the person can either benefit by calling me back or lose something if they don’t call me back.  We are all interested in anything that can help us.

To your success and your future.

The Four Agreements; book summary

As a reader I read lots of books that are sometimes complex and take too long and too many pages to make a simple point. Then there are times I run across little gems that are quick reads with a strong, straight to the point message.

On of my most recent reads The Four Agreements was one of the latter. It was a quick read with a powerful straight to the point message with very specific action steps.   I guess that is why it was on the New York Times Bestsellers list for over seven years.

You can find the book here http://www.amazon.com/Four-Agreements-Practical-Personal-Freedom/dp/1878424319

The author outlines four basic agreements that we all must have with ourselves.  These agreements are between you and you.  Which means you can control them.

Here are my notes as well as mini book summary of the book itself.

  • The need for attention is something that all adults have and is something that is ingrained in us in childhood.
  • Most of the agreements that we have accepted in our lives were established when we were young.  Think about it, you accepted your own name.  You had no decision in your own name.
  • Children don’t usually get to choose their own beliefs.  Instead we accept the beliefs of our parents or others as we are growing up.
  • To be alive is the biggest fear humans have. Death is not the biggest fear we have; our biggest fear is taking the risk to be alive–the risk to be alive and express what we are. We have learned to live our lives trying to satisfy other people’s demands. We have learned to live by other peoples point of view because of the fear of not being accepted and of not being good for someone else.
  • The way we judge ourselves is the worst judge that ever existed.

The First Agreement: Be Impeccable with your word.

  • The word is a force; it is the power you have to express and communicate, to think, and thereby to create events in your life. You can speak. What other animal on earth can speak? The word is the most powerful tool you have as a human.
  • The word can kill millions of people or save millions of people. Choose your words carefully.
  • Impeccability means “without sin”. A sin is anything that you do which goes against yourself.
  • So when you are impeccable you do not do anything that goes against yourself.
  • Self-Rejection is a mortal sin, this is the sin that most humans inflict on themselves.
  • Changes must first occur with yourself so later you can make changes on how you deal with others.
  • What you say to yourself and how you say things to yourself is why you must be impeccable with your words. Never do yourself harm with your words.

The second agreement: Don’t take anything personally.

  • Personal importance, or taking things personally, is the maximum expression of selfishness because we make the assumption that everything is about me.
  • Nothing other people do is because of you.
  • You will only need to trust yourself to make responsible choices. You are never responsible for the actions of others, you are only responsible for you. When you truly understand this, and refuse to take things personally, you can hardly be hurt by the careless comments or actions of others.
  • By following this second agreement you avoid many upsets in your life. Your anger, jealousy, and envy will disappear.

The third agreement: Don’t make assumptions

  • We all have the tendency to make assumptions about everything. The problem with making assumptions is that we believe they are the truth.
  • We make assumptions about what other people are thinking or doing–we take it personally, then we blame them by reacting.
  • When you make assumptions, you are asking for problems.
  • The whole war of control between humans is about making assumptions and taking things personally. Our whole dream of hell is based on that.
  • We create a lot of emotional poison just by making assumptions and taking things personally.
  • We make assumptions because we don’t have the courage to ask questions.  
  • We overestimate and underestimate ourselves because of the assumptions we have made.
  • If others change, it’s because they want to change, not because you can change them.

The fourth agreement: Always do your best

  • This fourth agreement allows the other three to become deeply ingrained habits.
  • Under all circumstances always do your best.
  • Remember that your best will and can vary depending on that moment.
  • When you always do your best you learn to accept yourself.
  • Action is about living fully. Inaction is the way we deny life.

There is no way. If you are impeccable with your word, if you don’t take anything personally, if you don’t make assumptions, if you always do your best, then you are going to have a beautiful life. You are going to control your life 100 percent.

  • Who stops is from being free? We blame the government, we blame the weather, we blame our parents, we blame religion, we blame God. Who really stops us from being free?  We stop ourselves.
  • Awareness is always the first step because if you are not aware, there is nothing you can change. If you are not aware that your mind is full of wounds, and emotional poison, you cannot begin to clean and heal the wounds and you will continue to suffer.
  • First Mastery of Awareness: This is to be aware who we really are, with all the possibilities,. The second is Mastery of Transformation–how to change, how to be free of domestication. The third Mastery of Intent. Intent from the point of view is that part of the transformation of energy is possible; it is the one living being that seamlessly encompasses all energy, or what we call God. Intent is life itself; it is unconditional love. The Mastery of Intent is therefore the Mastery of Love.
  • Forgiveness is the only way to heal.  We can choose to forgive because we feel compassion for ourselves.
  • It is the emotions that control the behavior of the human, not the human who controls the human. 
  • Maybe we cannot escape from the destiny of the human, but we have a choice: to suffer or to live and be happy. To live in hell, or to live in heaven.

As I read this book I was reminded that when I apply these four agreements everyday that  I will live a happier and less complex life.  These four agreements are areas that I have full control over in my life.

To your success and your future.